Another way to love wasteland *puts it on repeat*

wasteland perfectly describes my feelings right now, after seeing the results, it hurt me so much that it left my heart in a heap of wasteland. My heart is like a wasteland now. I feel nothing,but yet i still feel the pain of the wound. I'm seriously gonna hate myself this time, for the outcome of the result can only be the result of my own doing.

"where is she? where is she now~" "where did u go? where did u go????" "GO, GO,Go! you left my heart in a wasteland" 

Where is that someone who would comfort me now? i think i can start acknowledging my friend's mum as my godmum. She called me early in the morning to ask me abt the results, so much worried than my mum, waited for the results with me and comforted me, she has done the things i needed right now. luckily i have her, what a blessing it is. 

My i got my first round of results, though i told everyone:" its good, its good. How bad can it be anyway? " But the sadness in me, its so big that even i can't contain it, and it kinda showed in my face. Even my mum noticed it. I don't want her to see me like this ( tying this early in the morning cos she's still asleep) I don't want her to see me so weak and helpless. Ok, maybe i don't wanna see my mum right now, she's the last person whom i want to know the state i am in now. (my dad too.. in fact my whole family.) Yet i don't understand why i treasured the care and concern that my friend's mum has for me than any other. She's like the mum that i never knew i had.  Could it be that i never did treat my parents as my own?

Can time please stop now? i don't want to go on anymore,i don't want to know what the future hold for me anymore. Please stop, Please end it already.

shuhui signing off (with tears and wasteland playing)

a little update on project rebirth. ( yes~! its 3/5 through! )

this could be the longest that i've been working on. This took me a whole week to finish. But my stupid handphone camera made it look so bad. Tell u the truth, it looks better on my paper.

sorry, please endure with the quality lacknes in the mean time. I'm so going to get a scanner!After i get it, i'm gonna reupload all the other fanart, hopefully with improved quality.

I think i'm gonna start working on leader's now. Hopefully it'll turn out good. Everytime i see jungmin's basic sketch.. well you can say i don't really wanna work on it so soon yet. 

In the mean time, please do take a look at this and other fanart too, and leave a comment if u would. 

jungmin inspired.

this post was inspired by jung min and the sudden fear that i have developed against him. It originated from a dream i had of him, not the usual "spending a really nice day" kind of dream. My whole dream is just jung min standing infront of me, laughing with that smirk on his face throughout. God.. that really gave me the creeps, the picture below are pictures collected to show you the scary side of jung min.

click on it to view.

photo credits goes to:http://triplesphilippines.blogspot.com/ or otherwise stated in it.

i'll update this post when i see another side of him or any other members. Or maybe i'll update this once i got over the fear first..

missing them..

with little news coming from the boys lately ( and also due to me not having any inspirations today..) it has caused me to do " missing them art"

really miss them alot.. sigh.. hope their doing fine.

updates ( well not really.. ) more thoughts of redrawing > _< argh!!

trying my best to improve more on my fanart recently, especially under the pressure of other fanart that i've seen. After i was done with the red day project, comes the much delayed project rebirth.

here are some updates on it:

this is the original one..

And this is the combined one. I did some adjustments to it so that the shadings that i did could be seen. The surrounding shadings of the drawing are not done by me..

I think not drawing for a couple of days not only bought me withdrawal symptoms but losing my skills at the same time too. Somehow saengie just looks weird in my drawing, yup just weird. I'm trying hard to improve on the shading and trying to make them look more like the photo. Guess i tried too hard on the shading part and neglected abt the likeness part..

Updates on status of other parts of project rebirth : 

 1) maknea (having thoughts of redrawing)

 2) kyu  ( having thoughts of redrawing..)
 3) saegie (Having thoughts of redrawing too, now that i look at it. )
 4) leader ( basic sketches done)
 5) jung min ( he's a hard one to draw, so i'm putting him last)

i think i'm gonna die if i redrew everyone of them.. off to work again. Thanks again for visiting.